42/16 My Monologues & Musings : Do not worry...
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?”(Mt 6:25)
Dear Jesus,
You know me through and through that I am prone to worry even over minor matters.
Though currently I am less worried I used to be a bundle of worries and a nervous wreck! As a school going boy,
I used to be unduly worried class tests and exams.. especially for a Viva!
I used to be worried about being caught for wrong doings at home or at school.
As a novice and as a seminarian :
I used to be worried over promotion, over being sent away ..
I had dreamed that once becoming an ordained priest I will be more secure and will have less worries!
No way!
Oh. boy! worried and worries!
Seemingly unending worries!
Even after becoming a priest..
I had my worries and anxieties.
May be worries of different nature!
In my initial years as a young priest
I was over anxious to please and was ambitious which resulted in frequent clashes with superiors and colleagues.
I became very accident prone especially with the use of vehicles.
I became a nervous and anxiety ridden basket case!
Sure, I did pray to you ..read the Sacred Scriptures..
I tried to “cast out (my) your anxieties on to the Lord.”
But it was more of a lip service and a sort of a ritualism.
I did not really cast out my anxieties onto you!
Instead, I was clinging to them!
Dear Jesus,
How I wish!
I had left my worries and anxieties to you!
Well, my selfish motives and egoistic ambitions had the upper hand!
It took big falls and terrible failures to turn to you and pay heed to you.
My worries and anxieties are comparatively less due to my advancing age and costly lessons of life.
I have yet to get a firm grip over them.
I will keep trying!
It is not easy, Lord!
Dear Jesus,
I bring before you all those fellow humans who are really burdened with wtheir and anxieties.
May they find strength and comfort with you.
Dear Jesus,
Today, in a very special way,
We we bring before you:
All the sick and ailing,
All the terminally ill,
All those uncared and abandoned sick,
For Your Healing, Comforting Touch.
May they experience your Healing Love
Through the care and attention of fellow humans.
Oh, Jesus, My Lord and My God,
I thank You,
I thank the Father,
I thank the Spirit,
For Your Unsolicited gift of life for me!
For Your Uncountable blessings for me!
For Your Unlimited Patience with me!
For Your Untold Forgiveness for me!
For Your Unflinching faith in me!
For Your Unfailing Hope in me!
For Your Unconditional Love of me!
Amen
JoAchen
Thursday, 11th February, 2016
These Reflections are neither pure scientific exegesis nor are they any highly theological explanations. They are a sort devotional musings and monologues mainly meant for my personal renewal and spiritual growth. They are a part of my journaling of the Prodigal Priest in me as I struggle to return to the Home of our Heavenly Father. I do place these Reflections in public as part of a therapeutic and holistic healing. As I keep holding you in my prayers and I request you to include me in yours. Thank you!
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