13/16 My Monologues & Musings :
“Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?"
(Jn 21: 15-19)
When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you." Jesus said, "Feed my lambs." Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?" He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you." Jesus said, "Take care of my sheep." The third time he said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?" Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you." Jesus said, "Feed my sheep. I tell you the truth, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go." Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God.”
Dear Jesus,
How unmatchable is your unconditional love for Peter!
Just a few days ago, your hand picked Peter had disowned you, right?
Not once but thrice in quick succession!
Remember, just hours before his denials,
he had boisterously proclaimed that come what may, he will never betray you!
Yet impulsively and emphatically he declared that he doesn't know you!
That's human weakness!
Lord, You knew your Peter so well that he is neither malicious nor vindictive towards you!
Dear Jesus,
How great is your forgiveness of Peter!
How unmerited is your forgiveness of him!
How unconditional is your forgiveness!
Though it is not recorded that Peter formally asked your forgiveness, the tears
running down his cheeks and bitter weeping was enough for you.
It is interesting that you did even see him weeping over his denials of you!
Yet you forgave him unconditionally!
Not only that,
Now you value his love!
You want his love!
You ask for his love!
You ask him not once but thrice!
Though unpredictable and impulsive your Peter is,
Lord, repeatedly you seek out his love!
Humanly speaking, it is so unimaginable and unthinkable of the way you offered him unmerited forgiveness and the way you sought out his love for you!
And his response was an unreserved commitment of his renewed love you!
Dear Jesus,
I am far more worse than your Peter.
I have disowned you not just three times,
but thirty three times, three times and much more!
Comparing with Peter, I am unmatched in my denials of you!
I have outdone him hundreds of times!
Yet I just keep failing to commit myself in a consistent manner.
Once your Peter repented, he never kept hurting you or kept denying you.
Dear Jesus,
In my case, I keep on making the same mistakes over and again for the last seventy years or so.
How I wish to be consistent like your Peter!
Though I keep hurting you, you keep on forgiving me!
You keep asking me, whether I love you more than anybody or anything?
How ashamed I am of myself, as I am unable to reply like Peter band keep on loving you!
Even if I reply positively I may not keep my word as I have been doing!
Do I love you more than anyone or anything?
Oh, No! Not always!
Often I love myself far too much!
Often, I love my Ego more !
Often, I love to to get attention and appreciation more than anything or anybody!
Dear Jesus,
Thank you for your seemingly unlimited forgiveness! How much you must be loving me!
I keep myself amazed at your unconditional, unmerited, and unlimited love me!
I wish that I don't hurt you and disappoint you any more!
Dear Apostle Peter,
It must have been agonizingly painful for you as the Lord kept on asking you whether you love him more anybody or anything else!
You were well aware of your past failures, right?
Did you feel that the Lord is raking up your past?
But then you must been astonished
when your Lord asked you to feed his sheep, right?
You were beginning to feel the depth of his love for you, his unconditional love for you!
Ever since you not hurt your Lord, right?
Blessed you are!
Will I ever able to love the Lord in return for all the love he has been lavishing me?
Oh, Jesus, My Lord and My God,
I thank you for your :
Unsolicited gift of life for me!
Uncountable blessings for me!
Unlimited Patience with me!
Untold Forgiveness for me! I
Unflinching faith in me!
Unfailing Hope in me!
Unconditional Love of me!
Amen
JoAchen
Wednesday, 13th January, 2016
Dear Reader,
These Reflections are neither pure scientific exegesis nor are they any highly theological explanations. They are a kind of devotional monologues and musings and a part of my journaling of the Prodigal Priest in me as I struggle to return to the Home of our Heavenly Father. As I keep holding you in my prayers and I request you to include me in yours. Thank you!
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